You don't know Jack

My sister called yesterday inquiring about the status of the jack in the trunk of the Mazda I gave her daughter a couple years ago. First, I had to correct her - it isn't a Mazda. Second, how do I know if the jack still works? It was functional the last time I used it. The reason she asked was the niece had a flat and her boyfriend tried unsuccessfully to change it. How do you "try" to change a tire? You just do it. In the end, he blamed the jack. I met her last night, and I changed the tire - there was no jack problem.

I can't think of a worse offense in my family (well, there is that one, but hold your tongue!) for a man to be unable to change a tire. Can you say redneck? The previously mentioned boyfriend has sunk lower in the eyes of his future in-laws. His white-bred background does not mix well with his love's kinfolk. One joke is that he was only taught how to dial AAA and not actual work. If only I could get my family to dial AA. It makes me wonder if he can actually dial a phone without assistance. I think he needs to surrender his penis and go in the kitchen with the women.

I remember my flat tire last Thanksgiving - my oldest brother grabbed the jack and lifted the car (with the jack, so don't even post that comment) as I loosened the lug nuts. I've made sure the boy can change a tire as well as other essentials, and his mother got a crash course as well, but there is nothing wrong when a woman can't do it - 'cause there's puhlenty to keep'm busy in da kichun.